Approval Is Like A Drug

It is addictive and we instantly develop a need for more

(By; Noli Cerrillo)

Do you believe? That we all exist in this world with the need for relationship?- to have at least somebody in our lives who appreciates us? happy to be with us? and value us?

Like many of the other characteristic, This needs for approval is neither good or bad. Rather than, It is a basic need that is vital for normal relationship. It is only when the need has been cut off or become excessive that it develops a problem.

The wrong idea that one is unacceptable or less important in some way for most part develops in our childhood. The belief that we are incomplete or less in some way can cause us to be overly fixated on winning approval from others in our effort to silence the sense of failings nagging us inside.

Because we need approval so much we can make ourselves excessively sensitive to criticism. We become “Yes Man” or “Yes Girl” since the “No” might bring disapproval. For most, the fear of rejection and blame can also make it hard with authority character such as supervisors, teachers or bosses. Yes, even spouses.

Occasionally, an enormous need for green light, or approval can create an unreasonable compassion for others. This is mostly due to false belief that others are also susceptible to criticism and cold shoulders. Excessive sympathy normally leads to the development of a stiff rule that a person must always be considerate, generous, hypersensitive and charitable. It can also cause a person to act like a “super hero” presumptuously taking responsibility for keeping others happy.

Approval addicts are dependents upon the opinion of others. Recognition from others generates assurance and bolstered accomplishments.

Rejection destroys confidence and harshly interferes with person’s efficiency.

This can cause a person to consider a child’s role towards friends, relatives or children and continually check to see if accord and action meet the approval of others.

The following examples of self-talk typical to someone who seek excessive need for approval.

• If someone important expect me to do something, I should do it.
• Im not doing enough, I should do more
• I dont want them to be angry at me
• It must be my fault
• I cant stand being alone
• im nothing unless somebody loves me
• I need to be understood

If you are going to include other people in your life, you will experience rejection and discontent regularly. At times this is not because you have done something wrong. But because the other person is either thinking rationally or just making you a scapegoat. Something that has nothing to do with you.

The perfectionist belief that value is determined by accomplishments and failures are frequently horrible way of exaggerating the need for confirmation.
This is especially true when you are trying your best effort to live up to be a model of a “Perfect Person.” who is always acceptable, levelheaded and considerate. 

When this happens, rejection is seen as failure. This sense of failing is even bigger if the rejection is due to disproportionate action on your part.

When someone reject you, advise yourself that it does not mean you are meaningless. When you actually do something that is disagreeable or indiscreet, separate your action from your worth as an individual.

While discontent and opinion are uncomfortable, the trouble usually passes fairly quickly if you avoid crooked thinking and distract yourself with affirmative activities. 

So even though you may feel its aimless to begin, start an activity you have take pleasure in the past. If you observe yourself remembering the upsetting event or negative thought about it, divert your attention to more positive one.

Everyone judges you differently no matter how well or how bad you behave. Even when someone turns you down there are still people who will welcome you. Understand you.

You do not need approval of everyone you meet in order to be happy. Only your own thoughts can raise or lower your essence. Another persons approval or disapproval has no power to affect your character unless you believe what was said is true. No one can make you inferior without your consent.

(Credits to the owner of the pictures. I do not own copyright to the picture used in this blog-No Copyright Infringement Intended)

STOP TRUSTING YOUR MIND

Stop Trusting Your Mind

(By: Noli Cerrillo)

The Voice In Your Head Is Not YOU.

Here is the story of Kay from UK

Paranoia is something that I've been dealing with for my entire life. I always feel as if everyone is laughing at me and talking about me behind my back. I feel as if I can't trust anyone in my life, including my own family. For a while I couldn't even leave my own home. It's also made me lose a lot of friends and I am constantly feeling depressed. I have attempted suicide multiple times just because of my mind running wild. First time ever that I've felt as if I can share and after reading about all these other people who are suffering from what I am suffering, it has helped a little. And all the advise to help deal with it that people have suggested HOPEFULLY will make me get rid of this god forsaken disease. (Source: Institute Of Psychiatry-Paranoid Thoughts)

Trusting everything your mind says is a choice. The murmur in your head is a bit of a theatrical actor. It needs to be ignored.

Your thoughts invents a story and paints a picture with words.

Every now and then the picture is appealing and excellent. Other times it creates absurdity: Predicting the worse.

Therefore don’t be quick to believe that mentally maladjusted tiny jerk inside your head.

Anything we cannot explain, we fear. Even if the new knowledge we uncovered is slightly peculiar to something we presently accept-we will still likely produce an affecting reaction and this could be a profound and hardly obvious reaction or even more severe one.

Controlling your thoughts is the first step to a happier, healthier mind.

Here Is How;

1) Do not explain what the mind is telling you. Just observe.

Instead of reacting to all that you realize when the thought arise,

just say; “Ahh, OK”. Become an impartial observer of your thinking.

2) Meditate -Meditation isn’t really for monks or gurus. Business key players, Business persons and artists are using cognizant non thinking to achieve on a par levels of ingenuity and achievement

Twenty Minutes of Meditation at the start of each day aid other condition of your life and business success. 
Leaving the house forgetting to meditate is like leaving the house without your pants or you celphone.

How To Meditate Video 1

You dont have to do it now you can return to it later

 (please come back to me after the meditation)

3) Your mind is a greenhouse. Keep the pollution out.

Thoughts are like germs and many people are sick. 
It is important toguard your mind from negative idea and distortion, especially in hectic offices and massively populated areas. Your mind is a sanctuary:   

Without a strong gate, creatures will get in and ruin your greens. 
Stay away from damaging power of negative ideas and inaccuracy. Keep the creatures out  

Do You Mind?

“Your brain needs to forget things that are no longer useful and this forgetting is inevitable. It is useful and it is adaptive because it clears memory for things that are more relevant. The problem however, is that; In the process of all of this memory purging. Our brain forgets important information.” -By: Art Kohn of Learning Solutions

What Is “The Mind?”

(According to Wikipedia)

The mind is a set of cognitive faculties including consciousness, perception, thinking, judgement and memory.

The mind is the faculty of a human being’s reasoning and thoughts. It holds the power of imagination, recognition and appreciation, and is responsible for processing feelings and emotions, resulting in attitudes and action.

Here Is Another Story from; Louise, Australia



I sometimes get so paranoid that I think everyone is lying to me and that everyone is an actor (except me). It's basically like I am in the Truman Show and I am Truman. It's a really scary thought and I hope no one else ever experiences it because it is horrible.

Sadly, just as you developed many senseless beliefs, you also developed many illogical ways of converting information that are now part of this self moving thought process that, in turn. Contributes to anxiety.

According to the book Anxiety, Phobias and Panic: A key point of this automatic thought process is self talk-the silent conversation that everyone has inside when thinking. Your automatic self-talk, selective remembering, prepared stories and explanations, the selective points of view make up your habitual thinking pattern. The interpretation process that generates your emotion is, for the most part, based upon a combination of these automatic thinking pattern and your beliefs. By changing them, you can change the way you interpret events and dramatically and positively alter the experiences of life.

Changing The Way You Think

Changing behavior is basically a 3 Step Process.

First, you identify exactly those manner you want to remove.

Second, You identify exactly those behavior you want to do.

Third, you form substituting manner you want for those you want to change.

Changing The Way You Think With This Video

Pls Use Your Headphones

Profound Stress Reduction Meditation 2

by Lauren Ostrowski Fenton

Listen to my original meditation music

(Credits to the owner of the pictures, I dont own copyrights to the pictures used in this blog.
No Copyright Infringement Intended)



Feel Free To Share 

Reference;

The Elephant Journal

The Huffington Post

Shityouregosays.com

Learning Solution

Wikipedia

Institute of Psychiatry: Paranoid Thoughts

Anxiety, Phobias And Panic

So What?.. If You Don’t Have Money This Christmas.

So What?.. If You Don’t Have Money This Christmas.

What To Do When Santa Is Flat Broke

(By: Noli Cerrillo)

Center your attention on spending quality time with your loved ones instead of making everything perfect and you can make it a meaningful Christmas ever.

Let me just take a moment to say this before I get a violent reaction from the materialistic holiday dudes- Yes, I know that; Christmas is much more than presents..I know that. Nevertheless, that doesn’t mean the desire to give and receive gifts goes away-plainly because you don’t have enough cash.

In reality is that you really do not need to be anxious. There are alternatives than going shopping at the mall and spending too much money. Furthermore, Christmas is the time to reflect on the birthday of Jesus, spend quality time with family and friends instead of passing out due to too much to drink and merry making. Time to appreciate and be thankful of all the blessings not just material things in our lives. Take for example; Perfect health and no family grievances?

According to Inquirer.Net; More than 26 million Filipinos remain poor with almost half, or a little more than 12 million, living in extreme poverty and lacking the means to feed themselves, according to official government statistics. How else do you think they can afford to even celebrate Christmas?

Don’t you think, maybe you are more fortunate?

The real essence of Christmas?

From George F. McDougall define “Christmas means a spirit of love, a time when the love of God and the love of our fellow men should prevail over all hatred and bitterness, a time when our thoughts and deeds and the spirit of our lives manifest the presence of God.




Ways to celebrate Christmas without spending cash

1) Hear mass: there is a biblical citation that we usually forget every

Christmas due to our busyness with our preparations: The Shepherds in

Lukes infancy narrative in his gospel; were keeping watch over their

sheep on the nightly vigil. In a way, we are the same shepherds today

and we are entrusted by Jesus to keep watch over one another.

2)Watch light show and fireworks sponsored by the community or

business establishment. Kids love them

3) Join carollers, some group could use an alto or baritone. Don’t be

shy, believe me they need volunteers.

4) A gift of self; Christmas is about giving, but less about presents

people do not use after opening them. Spend some time giving

time volunteering to a charitable institution. They need help in

manpower to distribute gifts given by good holiday samaritans.

Call or inquire charitable institution and offer them your free

service. It is priceless.

You can enjoy Christmas your own way without money.

Do not emphasize too much about pleasing everybody or getting the best gift. Happiness does not come from material objects.

Center you attention on giving time with those who mean so much to you, rather than nervously waiting for a January full of bills and debts to give you a headache.

Buy Inexpensive Gifts This Christmas.
Buy Pines Brownies and Leche Flan
Call 0947-6487802 ask for Mel

(Credits to the owner of photos-I do not own copyrights to the picture used in this blog

No Copyright Infringement Intended)

Reference;

 Resource for a Happy Home

Lifehack

Inquirer.Net

Vanguard

Money Principle
Busted Halo

HOW TO MAKE CUPCAKES BY ALEXA

Alexa’s Cupcakes

(By Noli Cerrillo)

Not anymore just the area of expertise of the school bake sale.

With Imaginative designs and Yummy flavors, the dessert 

is a trendy addition to cafes, eateries and the bakery section 

of the local convenient stores.

Baked with a few basic ingredients, cupcakes can be made 

inexpensive and sold at a high margin. If you're an expert 

at mixing together a heap of icing and a mini cake, you 

probably will want to get baking and sell your cupcakes for 

an income.

Here... Try the Delicious cupcakes of my beautiful niece.. 

Alexa Cerrillo Bondoc .....She is still single guys!

The word‘cupcake’ initially used in the 

late 

19th century for 

cakes made from ingredients measured by the 

cupful.

The 

classic pound cake recipe was not difficult 

to remember for its pound of butter, pound of 

sugar, pound of flour, and pound of eggs. 

similarly, the name “cupcake” comes from how 

recipe was measured: 1 cup butter, 2 cups 

sugar, 3 cups flour, and 4 eggs.

Early cupcakes were baked in teacups or 

ramekins (small clay pots) before the 

creation of the multi-cup pans we use today. 

Hence, a cup of cake!

Alexa’s Cupcakes Simply Delectable

FOR ORDERS AND INQUIRIES  
PLS GO TO; 

ALEXA BONDOC ON FACEBOOK

OR JOY CERRILLO BONDOC ON Facebook

Hey its my niece, you may also contact me at 0917-8381391 or like noli cerrillo on Facebook